First of all, I know what you're thinking, "gee Weak Square, you havent posted in awhile." That is correct. My wife had a baby and I've been busy with work so sue me. You think it's easy being this awesome all the time? It's a blessing and a curse. So just sit back, read this article and laugh.
So this past weekend, I thought it would be fun to head up I-77 and visit our less sophisticated neighbors to the North for the North Carolina Open. I heard a rumor before the North Carolina Open started the event organizers were hoping to get 180-200 players. They must have been pleased when about 5,000 chess nerds descended upon Charlotte and all decided to stand in the hotel lobby the entire weekend. I'm serious, I don't think these people slept, they just stood all night long in the lobby.
Well my weekend sucked. I mean the tournament was really nice, but I played like a buffoon, and the NCCA took my 69 dollar check laughing all the way to the bank. In my first game I learned a new opening trap, courtesy of my opponent and I resigned on move 11. Yes, yours truly was the very first game finished in the first round, in record time. So in order to make myself feel better I went out into the lobby and beat up some kid.
My second game I actually won somehow after waiting for what seemed like an eternity while the event "organizers" were forced to pair the second round by hand after a "computer glitch". The computer glitch turned out to be the decision to use Swiss Sys instead of WinTD in the first place. Once they got the pairings up for round 2, I strongly considered telling them I was taking a bye this round for giggles. I know they would have been amused.
So after a 12 hour delay starting round 2, I managed to win a nice game versus the French defense, which every e4 player hates. When my opponent played 1... e6 he got kicked under the table, and then accidentally slapped in the face. There is always a special feeling when an e4 player beats the French, I guess we know how the Germans felt all those times.
My third game ended in annoying fashion when I decided to sacrifice 3 pawns in exchange for an early resignation and a trip to the bar.
I had a really nice game in the fourth round against an opponent about 200 points higher than me. We got to a drawish position and I made a bold move which ended up costing me a very important pawn because I missed a check. That's always fun. Missing checks. Anyway, my opponent went up an outside, passed pawn only four steps from queening. I resigned. My opponent told me after the game resigning was a mistake, the game probably would have ended in a draw anyway. After I told him he was an idiot, I went upstairs and put the position in the computer. Yep, he was right. I resigned when the evaluation of the position was +0.4. Lovely.
After a terrible four rounds, I decided the only the only thing that would make me feel better was alcohol and seeing my kids. So I did what any normal person would do, I grabbed a six pack to drink on the way home and let the event organizers know not to pair me by hand for the last round because I was headed to the house.
All in all it was a fun tournament as most out of town tournaments are. However losing sucks and I lost a lot. So I was in a foul mood most of the time I was there. Taking out my bad mood on kids, waitresses and cops always make me feel better though. I look forward to next year as long as the hotel's restraining order does not go through.
